Compulsive sexual behavior can devastate your life, particularly if you have been addicted for a long time. This has a wide range of both mental and psychosocial impacts on your life. It can harm your personal relationship with people, your personal development, and even your career. A lot of people who choose Nofap as a strategy for dealing with their compulsive sexual behavior often have to face the relapse challenge. But with the right help, you can go through the Nofap relapse recovery phase without many hassles.
Despite the fact that research has proven that challenges with Nofap relapse recovery affect up to 5-8% of the adult population, a lot of people still do not know how best to approach Nofap, the impacts of extreme sexual content use, and how to look for treatment for it.
Assuming you are worried that you or a friend or family member might be battling with constant Nofap relapse, understanding the contents of this article can be a great advantage towards finding a solution to your compulsive sexual behavior.
We will zero in on the principles of Nofap, and why you find yourself always relapsing in your journey of Nofap. We will likewise talk about the impact of compulsive sexual behavior on the mind and how it tends to be reversed after some time through Nofap.
While sex dependence and addiction to watching sexually explicit content are frequently connected, they can likewise exist independent of each other. But this content is centered solely on addiction watching such content and how to recover from them.
What Is Compulsive Sexual Behaviour?
Compulsive sexual behavior is defined as a state of dependence on sexually explicit content and materials including images, videos, and all kinds of graphics that are sexually provocative. There have been lots of debates as to whether addiction to such is really a thing or whether it’s just a myth founded and supported on the basis of morality, religious beliefs, and discipline.
Is there any scientific evidence backing up the Nofap Movement?
Here is the real fact; Scientists have been unable to point out if there are any benefits of Nofap. This is why the American Psychiatric Association has been unable to pin down addiction to watching sexually arousing contents as a diagnosis in their DSM 5 criteria for the diagnosis of mental illnesses.
But on the other hand, the only evidence supporting the proponents of Nofap is that the upholders have been consistently reporting marked improvement in the various spheres of their lives like; relationships, energy levels, increased muscle bulk, improved dating experience, self-confidence, and profound will power.
Theoretical Basis of Addiction
Just like in all other forms of addiction, the consumption of sexually explicit content causes the activation of the reward centers of the brain. The reward centers release a group of hormones that makes the body feel good upon performing that activity. These hormones are your dopamine and the Endorphins.
Here is where it gets tricky; the human brain records this activity that leads to the release of these feel-good hormones as pleasurable and wants to get more and more similar experiences at all costs.
This is the summary of what causes addiction to watching such…the brain craves those bouts of dopamine release during your session watching these content and during masturbation and will be willing to go against all odds to recreate such moments.
So slowly, this turns into a habit that cripples your productivity if not put under control.
Nofap Relapse Recovery: The Tough Journey To Manliness
Almost every young person once had a compulsion towards viewing sexually explicit materials. But once adulthood starts creeping in, they begin to realize how difficult it is to quit after so many years of dependence. So they go ahead to try lots of things;
- People who are religious attribute it to demonic manipulation and try to use prayers to follow it through…but to no avail.
- Some who believe in the power of discipline go ahead and join various online campaigns like the NOFAP November, only to find themselves relapsing after a few weeks.
The real truth is; Nofap is not a journey anyone can just walk through alone. You will be needing lots of inputs both from experts, coaches, and your watch groups.
How Long To Get The Nofap Benefits?
There are lots of content online about the 3 weeks window recovery period to reformulate any habit. This does not work the same for any form of addiction.
According to Nofap Expert and Mind Coach; J.K Emezi, it takes nothing less than 2 years to fully recover from all the damages which their compulsive sexual behavior has done to your brain and body.
His reason was that we people spend lots of years indulging in this compulsive habit…so it is also expected that it will take them quite long to fully reboot from whatever damages it has caused. And from his own experience, this was 2 years.
25 Sneaky Reasons For Constant Nofap Relapse
You must have been waiting too long to get launched into this section of the blog post. But we had to take extra care so that you will understand the foundational principles of this topic before we launch you into finding the right solution for your Nofap strategy.
If you have been struggling with Nofap relapse, never think that you are alone. A lot of people have been struggling too, and have failed and have given up altogether. But if you still believe there is still hope for you out there, then this list is for you.
According to experts, there are proven reasons why most persons struggling through constant Nofap relapse have been finding it difficult to keep up. And there is also an explanation for these reasons. And here they are;
According to J.K Emezi, the biggest barrier to rebooting for any man is denial and failure to come to terms that you are addicted to watching sexually explicit content.
People in this category fall into the trap of trying to justify their compulsive behavior. Or in some cases, most persons completely deny this fact and may not believe that it may be causing issues for them.
But in some cases, they are not to blame because the overall act of coming to terms with their compulsive sexual behavior can have serious financial or legal consequences. People like this especially affluent men have great things to lose so they want to do all they can to avoid jail time or large fines.
Watching sexually explicit content online can be an expensive habit when you are hiring escorts or signing up for premium content online. Men with average financial means often hit a financial threshold where they are no more able to fund their behavior. But a man with great wealth can fund this behavior which allows him to be in denial for much longer.
The fear of falling from the social pedestal you live in can be a barrier holding down your reboot especially for people with great affluence.
Due to the negative stigma associated with viewing sexually explicit content, coming clean about such becomes very imperative.
The idea of what people will say or think of you, or even losing your status can be very terrifying. This is especially for people who come from highly respected homes. Examples are people who hold strong positions in churches or in well-respected organizations. People from such families have a strong reputation to uphold.
If people found out about their compulsive sexual behavior, they could face serious consequences not just for themselves, but also for their families.
The shame and guilt associated with addiction problems hold a lot of these persons back from seeking help.
3. The Rock Bottom Effect
People especially those with inflated self-esteem will never reach out for help with their addiction problem until they hit rock bottom.
Rock bottom is unique for different people and everyone has their own definition of where their rock bottom is.
- This could be when you loose your job
- When your loved one leaves you
- When your children find out
- When you are zero on cash
- Or when they are caught watching sexual content at work and much worse when you are filmed and it’s circulating on social channels.
This is a very humiliating experience that is crucial for people struggling with Nofap relapse to finally realize that they really do need help.
A lot of people often get distracted while dealing with their compulsive sexual behavior. Because addiction comes with different challenges like relationship crises, issues at work, etc.
Instead of people getting to the root cause of these challenges and tackling their compulsive sexual behavior, they rather go and spend money on taking classes, hiring exotic relationship therapists.
These people seek out elite personal trainers and business coaches to work out their problems in these other areas. Meanwhile, they are distracting themselves from taking care of the addiction which is the true cause of the issue.
5. Absence of Mentorship
Letting go of your compulsive sexual behavior cannot be successful without a direct or indirect mentorship from someone you look up to. Due to ego or shame, a lot of people often neglect the importance of having someone you look up to in your Nofap journey.
Your mentor should be someone who has the following qualities; acceptance, absence of bias, fairness, and compassion.
A lot of people do make the mistake of running to religious organizations for such mentorship. But the truth is that if such an organization sees such as an “evil” thing or the work of a demon, it will rarely help your progress.
It will increase your shame and guilt and discourage you from attending important mentorship forums like counseling. No one likes to be seen as an evil person who always gives in to demonic activities.
6. Failure to join accountability groups
Accountability groups are those online and offline platforms where people who are also in their Nofap journey meet and share their daily struggles without bias and judgment.
This helps a lot as it increases your confidence as you see other people who experience the same thing as you do such as the Nofap relapse effects.
Or you can even form your own accountability group of like-minded persons either on Whatsapp or any of the social channels and encourage people battling with constant Nofap relapse
The great thing about accountability groups is the compassion and love shared among the members passing through a similar struggle.
7. Refusal to celebrate small wins
When you celebrate small wins, small amounts of feel-good hormones are also released by the brain. These hormones give the brain a sense of accomplishment. So instead of the brain celebrating over the accomplishment from viewing sexually explicit, it is replaced by the feeling of accomplishment from Nofap. This way, the brain is tricked into forgetting the old trigger for feeling good.
The best way to celebrate small wins while rebooting from your compulsive sexual behavior is to set a timeline…like in weeks or in months. You can share these wins on your journal, your accountability groups and watch how better you will perform in your next timeline.
8. Not Keeping a Nofap journal
Journaling is a great way of being accountable. A lot of people shy away from keeping journals Nofap journals because it reminds them of their relapses or because they feel it is time-wasting.
While journaling requires a little bit of consistency and discipline to maintain, a lot of people in Nofap forums and communities have actually found it helpful in keeping their compulsive sexual behavior in check.
9. Keeping the triggers close by
Triggers are those things that increase your chances of relapsing.
The popular triggers for most people include; alcohol, staying alone for long, pressing their phone, or going through their social channels late in the night.
Taking extra care to avoid your triggers is a great way of staying out of addiction.
If you live alone, try not to spend so much in your house…go outside and interact with friends or with nature. If you have the habit of watching YouTube videos late at night, it is time to stop the YouTube night data plan and so on.
10. Not having a hobby
Hobbies are great ways of keeping yourself engaged to decrease the thoughts of watching sexually explicit content. Great hobbies for people going through Nofap include; hitting the gym, playing outdoor games like; football, basketball, volleyball, tennis, etc. Or any physical activity at all that keeps you outside your room.
Having so much confidence in your ability to stay out of your compulsive sexual behavior can backfire at any time.
You must learn to keep yourself in check even when you feel like relapsing.
In your recovery journey, a time will come when you will actually start finding your compulsive sexual behavior disgusting and all. But it is essential that you still keep your guard up to avoid the necessary triggers that could lead to relapse.
12. Lack of self-acceptance
Actually, the first most important step to Nofap is self-acceptance. You need to understand that this is just an addiction you need to get rid of.
It is not caused by some sort of demonic possession or satanic manipulation like so many people are preaching today. There is a scientific basis for addiction and when you take the right steps in your recovery, you will find yourself making good progress.
Self-acceptance means practicing empathy, compassion, and self-love as opposed to being judgemental, seeing yourself as disgusting, and having hatred for yourself.
Acceptance will help you o through your Nofap relapse recovery in the most healthy way possible.
13. Start Counting From Day 1 after a relapse
Starting your Nofap recovery journey does not mean that you will never relapse along the way. But the mistake that most people make is to start counting again from day 1 in their Nofap calendar.
Doing this will demotivate you and hold down your effort.
But when you understand that minor slips are a part of the recovery process, it makes it easier for you to handle. This is self-acceptance and compassion.
The best way to handle a relapse is to find out the triggers that led to your relapse by carefully examining yourself. And when you find the trigger(s), find a way to remove them and promise yourself to do better next time.
14. Get Cynical about your recovery method
A wise man once said that the 1st step to failure is not planning to win, and the second step is believing that winning is not possible.
Getting cynical about your recovery method means not believing that a day will ever come when you will start living your life freely without any compulsive sexual behavior.
This has made many who started out their Nofap journey just fine but who gave up along the line due to a lack of faith in their recovery method.
Whenever you have an element of doubt about your Nofap relapse recovery, it is best to share it with your mentor, coach, or in your accountability group.
15. Purposefully ignoring the factors that led you to your relapse
The best practice after a relapse is to find out your triggers or the factors that led you to relapse.
The second best practice is working on those factors that led you to your relapse to see how you can fix them.
The worst practice after a relapse is ignoring the factors that led you to a relapse. When you do so, you will find those factors replaying themselves multiple times.
16. Letting go of all you have learned about your addiction up till now
This is also an element of over-confidence. Never let go of all you have learned of your addiction. When you forget them, you are just creating a space for more addiction.
17. Looking for justifications for your compulsive sexual behaviour
Whenever you start looking for reasons to justify anything, trust me; multiple reasons will appear.
Any form of compulsive behavior or addiction is not justifiable. The fact remains that it is an addiction and keeps you from making real progress in life.
So stop looking for those justifications and focus on your Nofap journey.
18. You Neglect Other Self-Help Programs
When you are in your Nofap relapse recovery process, never neglect other self-help programs that could help your quick recovery.
Hypnosis and listening to affirmations is proven technique for letting go of any compulsive behavior. Whether it is alcohol addiction, drug addiction, or compulsive sexual behavior.
A good number of people find listening to daily positive affirmations helpful in keeping a positive mindset every day during their Nofap journey.
19. You switch to other forms of addiction
Replacing your compulsive sexual behavior with other forms of addiction will never help. A lot of people find themselves switching to alcohol, drugs, and so on for pleasure. Remember that all these are triggers and will never help your pron reboot.
20. Giving In To Your Nofap Symptoms
In many Nofap accountability groups, a lot of members complain heavily about their addiction withdrawal symptoms. This is more for those who have been dependent for many years.
These come in form of headaches, pains, and all sorts of complaints. This is often so unbearable for many that they give up altogether.
But according to experts, withdrawal symptoms are still part of the Nofap journey. For some, this might be so severe, but the good news is that with time, all those symptoms go away.
21. Lack of Self Care
During your Nofap journey, you should take part in other activities that improve your overall mental, physical, and emotional well-being.
Experts advise that you should start physical dating, hitting the gym regularly, eating good food, reading, learning new skills, starting a business, and pursuing your career.
22. Not Staying Educated and up to date on rebooting
Nofap is a continuous journey. You should keep yourself updated and reminded of the best practices for rebooting. This is where excellent mentorship comes in.
Self-isolation on its own is a trigger for relapse, and this must be taken into consideration by all who are currently in their Nofap relapse recovery.
Whenever you find yourself alone in the room doing nothing but swiping through your social channels, then you are close to a relapse.
24. You Can’t Get Off Social Channels
The algorithm for all social channels today is built in such a way that will make people spend longer times viewing what they love.
The big companies running the social channels have what is called an advertising ID. This ID is a tracker that is unique for every internet user.
Using this tracker, they can easily figure out the kind of pages you follow, the posts you like, and the websites you visit often.
They are doing this so that they can serve your advertisements that are based on your preferences as detected by your advertising ID.
So whenever you are online, the chances that you will see adverts from your most visited sites with sexually explicit content are high. This increases your chances of relapsing.
One way to circumvent this is to reset your advertising ID on your mobile phone, unfollow those people/pages whose contents are sexually provocative, and replace them with pages that share valuable content on their timeline.
Getting off social channels completely offers a complete cure to this.
25. Waiting for quick benefits just after starting Nofap
According to experts; how long it takes for one to reap the benefits of Nofap completely is approximately 2 years.
So you may not be enjoying all those benefits of Nofap you see on Reddit and your Facebook groups anytime soon.
Nevertheless, never give up on your reboot, keep moving till you reach the top.
Final Words On Nofap Relapse Recovery
Above are the top 25 reasons why most people who are on Nofap keep failing.
Nofap is not a journey you should go alone all on your own. Go through the 25 reasons above and find out which ones have been holding down your Nofap progress and find ways of fixing them.
I wish you success in your journey to freedom from compulsive sexual behavior.